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Best Darn Twist Out on 4C Natural Hair

twistout

Girl it’s only a year and half later but I’m finally getting around to doing the blog post to accompany my popular video on the best twist out ever for 4C natural hair. Please excuse my tardiness.

I’m often asked about how I do my twists out, or how to get twist outs to look right on kinky hair in general. I think for many of us without super thick heads of hair, getting the twist out with the mushroom effect isn’t really that easy as simply twisting hair at night and taking it out in the morning. For me, it was about finding the right products or more so ingredients that would puff up my hair just enough to give the illusion of thicker hair, while still holding the definition of a twist out.  Enter Shea Moisture.  [click to continue…]

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tamanu

So Shea Moisture has my mailing address on file and they freely send me product whenever they like, by like complete surprise. Girl, i sho’ ain’t complaining, they can send some of the makeup line right over my way just make sure it’s fluorescent beige friendly. Now on to the actual product that was sent my way. The Nubian Heritage Indian Temp & Tamanu Anti-Breakage. I received almost the whole line sans the gel/edge control and serum. That includes the:

[click to continue…]

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empres

This is one of my favorite protective styles, as super simple for anyone to achieve. All you need is a hair tie, bobby pins and some marley/kinky hair which is available at any and every beauty supply store. My tutorial is specifically aimed at those with kinky hair or thick hair that’s usually harder to get into one ponytail without blowdrying it a bit straight first. This is my method for getting my hair into the bun without heat and how I slick down my edges, cause I understand the struggle of being a kinky 4c and laying them edges dooooowwwn. [click to continue…]

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bigfeet

Some of us have the unfortunate experience of having big feet. Oh hush to all the ladies with a size 9/9.5 complaining about their shoe size. As a clean size 11 we could swap shoe sizes any day. Promise. Not only do have a large shoe size, but I’m only 5’7. I’ve attempted to ask God why, but I’m sure he’s busy dealing with more important issues then my insecurities about how big my feet look compared to my height. Better, stronger foundation…maybe? Yes, I am a true blue size 11. Not a 10.5, there is no squeezing my big AND pinky toe into a size 10. My foot is not wide or narrow, it’s just a size 11. All day I give side eyes to my sister who is the sometimes 11 but can swing a 10 or 10.5 and she’s 5’9. As I’ve gotten over the insecurity about my feet, it’s often been very frustrating going shoe shopping. I want to wear cute shoes too. I want a nice nude pump or the sexy heels to compliment my outfit. You know how wacktastic it is to get cute, face beat with your best outfit on and then you look down at your feet and realize you don’t have any shoes to go with your outfit. Anything over size 10 has long been relegated to old lady shoes, sneakers and boots. None of that goes with the classic black dress on a date night. Fortunately times have changed, larger shoe sizes are becoming more prevalent even if they still don’t meet the demand but the glories of high line shopping have made life a little bit easier. So here are my tips on shopping and finding the right shoe for my size 10+ ladies. [click to continue…]

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The 4C Natural Hair Struggle

struggle

Hey girl…you over there frustrated with your natural hair. Ohhh lawd that rhymes! Are you over it? Tired of the dry, unmanageable, impossible to detangle, won’t/can’t/never stay moisturized? No amount of grease will add shine to your coils? Do your twist-out’s always succumb to shrinkage and just become a ball of fuzzy puffiness?

Well, hey girl, hey! I am here just for you! I’ve curated this list of my vlogs that will help you on the journey to embracing and enjoying your natural hair! We have to break down the barriers of a natural hair community that has perpetuated the myth of shiny curls and baby hairs as the standard for natural hair. Your coils and kinks are just as beautiful, if not more versatile. So let’s start with some quick tips:

  • Your hair is fine, there’s nothing wrong with how it grows.
  • Moisturizing starts with the wash routine. Also steaming the hair can do miracles for those who have had a hard time getting hair to stay moisturized.
  • The weather definitely affects your hair’s moisture. Summertime humidity can make it tricky with the glycerin and winter time frigid air just drys up everything.
  • Stop styling your hair wet….girl, just no. Damp or close to dry is key. Allow your hair to air dry post wash in chunky twists with a dab of moisturizing product in your hair. Complete your moisture regimen once your hair has dried up a bit. This cuts back on shrinkage and overall dry time. Ain’t nothing like spending a few hours setting your hair at night to take it out in the morning and it still be wet. UTTER. DISAPPOINTMENT. -_-
  • If you want to grow your hair long and would like to see more growth, protective styling is where it’s at.

Now on to the details, details: [click to continue…]

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On: Losing Friends & Lack of Support

wackfriends

Friends, I thought as I matured though would be easier to hold on to. What I’ve found is the more I become good with me, the more I find my own path to success, the more I move outside the square box and re-draw what I consider to the success of the American Dream, the more my “friendships” fall off. For me it almost always comes down to communication. How one communicates, in a world that is so filled with words that are no more than hot air. Where people are so use to saying what you want to hear rather than what they actually mean. False promises are a daily occurrence and people just use more words to fill up their shortcomings. I only use words to mean what I say and say what I mean. My word is all I have. So I take words seriously. nphotoI do not expect my friends to be my biggest supporters. I’m very fortunate to have a family that fills that role. Many won’t have family or friends support them, when they chose endeavors that are not common. Partly because we often take for granted the people that we have as constants in our life, it’s not always hate. So don’t hold back on pursuing dreams because your friends or family can’t see it for you. They’ll come around eventually. Their support might be more of the verbal and emotional variety. Now let’s get to what inspired this post. I have yet to experience another situation which has left me so disappointed. I don’t keep many friends on purpose. My intimate world is only previewed by a few outside of my immediate family. And everyone who walks in is given a piece of me. I find myself to be highly valuable, so pieces can be rather exclusive. I’ve previously wrote about this event, as I term it the “lunchervention“. A situation where, now former, friends sat me down to tell me about myself, expecting me to have an absolutely positive response to hearing sheer negativity about myself. No sense to be made. Post the lunch and blog post, I found myself in a situation where people were offended that I was offended. Upset, that I told me I did not like their approach and asking of me things that they couldn’t consider giving to me. How does one demand that you ‘think about what they’re saying’ but entirely refutes anything you have to say. How does this come from a person you perceived to be a friend? It’s 3 years later and it took me a while to reconcile and move on from the whole affair. It was all very odd as two people and myself, exchanged apologies while one person held on to their angst and fought every word I said with vile. In the end, I blocked her on every social media account I had. The other two, I saw one out at an event and she avoided me, the third on ended up blocking me on Facebook – the millennial way of ending a real life friendship. Those situations that leave your scratching your head, because extra words and false premises are exchanged behind your back. I have no clue and I can’t be concerned with those who care less about me. Post the lunchervention, here’s the email I sent to ‘friends’ explaining how I felt. It’s long, and I have a tendency to repeat myself, because I always fear people won’t understand my words: [click to continue…]

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